|Posted on August 3, 2013 at 12:05 AM|
The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
There certainly are grounds for divorce or break up, cheating, abuse (physical or emotional) and neglect. although according to scripture it's only fornication. But I have never known anyone that was abused or neglected that wasn't also being cheated on. And certainly dating is a way of interviewing potential candidates for marriage. However people in our day and age will date for years. This is not a biblical concept. And is definatley a lack of committment, and would in my view be fornicators. I've known people that were incredible, then the minute they got married they changed from Dr. Jeckel into Mr. Hyde, or Ms Hyde. So, while your in this early stage of dating this would be your trial period. During a trial period, things such as planning for the future, talking about marriage, sex, children or your partners children should not be part of this trial period. I've dated women that had a problem with my kids. And were constantly telling me what I should be doing with them and yet their own kids were unruley. I personally don't think the children should be brought into the relationship til you know for sure. The children don't deserve for you to allow them to get attached to someone and you drop them and break there hearts too. That, I think, is cruel. The problem is we tend to cross these boundries early on in a relationship. That is why people should wait. Wait to bring kids in, wait to have sex. Sex should be in a committed relationship only. My belief is based on this. People didn't used to date, this is a modern concept. What happened was you went in and slept with the woman you were intended to be with and she was your wife. Marriage does not take effect until consummation. The marriage ceremony is a party, however according to Jewish wedding ceremony and the Ketubah, or marriage contract, which is read in the original language. The husband accepts certain marital responsibilities, such as the provision of food, shelter and clothing for his wife, and promises to care for her emotional needs as well. (wow is this one sided) This contract is so important that the marriage ceremony is not complete until it is signed by the groom and presented to the bride. This demonstrates that both husband and wife see marriage as more than just a physical and emotional union, (at least for the man) but also as a moral and legal commitment. The Ketubah is also signed by two witnesses, and considered a legally binding agreement. It is forbidden for Jewish couples to live together without this document. For Jews, the marriage covenant symbolically represents the covenant between God and his people, Israel. But again this is man way. And the Jews built so many fence laws (Mark 7:13) I believe that when a man and woman have sex they have consummated marriage and are married. Common law, or an informal marriages have long since been recognized in both religious and in society in general. Fornication is casual sex between two people that either have not interest in a relationship or see their relationship as just a fling or part time flesh party. The newer translations call it sexual immorality. Any sex that is not between a man and woman in a commited relationship would be deemed fornication. I do believe in having a marriage ceremony, I do believe in rings, in the legal status and I want that. I do believe legally it's beneficial. I do believe that a couple should But what if situation, circumstances, finances or anything else prevent a couple from being legally married but their committment is there? I believe that if a man and woman have sex they are married and if they break up and start a new relationship that invovles sex, they are committing adultry. If a man and woman however just have sex and are not in a relationship, I do believe that they have committed fornication.
I can honastly say that it doesn't matter what I think, what anyone else thinks religious or not, only what God thinks. "Let God be true and every man a liar!" (Romans 3:4)
We cannot think or guess the mind of God. Or rely on our own interpretation of the word of God.
II PETER 1:20-21
Knowing this first, that no prophecy of the scripture is of any private interpretation. For the prophecy came not in old time by the will of man: but holy men of God spake as they were moved by the Holy Ghost.
Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.
This verse is not speaking about marriage but about obeying the laws of the land, which can be argued apply to the act of marriage. It can also be argued here that soon homosexual marriage may sadly soon become a reality. Does that mean because we are subject to the laws of the land that this should apply? Or about taking the mark when the bible clearly teaches that those that do so will lose their soul. Jesus said in Matthew that moses, not God, gave a writing of divorce because of the hardness of our hearts. But Jesus tells us that if we marry another, unless they cheated on you, null and voids it and thus your new marriage is adulterous. Not so with man's law. Which allows divorce on just about any grounds, plain and simply said because one partner wants out of the marriage contract. It can also be argued that in our culture today Two people that live in seperate locations are even together and have a committed relationship that that relationship would be seen as marriage in the eyes of God. I believe that the same rules apply. There is cleary a difference between having casual sex with multiple parnters and having sex in a committed relationship. I am not trying to make excuses not to get married, but to show you that there are none. That if your living as a couple, having sex and in a relationship, legal or not you are married, and thus the same rules apply. You can't slide in someones bed, or heart, and be unaccountable. Yes we all make mistakes, but we need to STOP, recognize our mistake, and STOP doing it.
I very much believe that sex should not be part of any relationship until you are committed. Which is hard to say. Because today someone can say I love you one minute and then break your heart the next. And there are no binding laws even in a legal marriage, you can get married and divorced in a month. And even though you have made a covenant. Let's look at the word covenant. I had to review what marriage means. It is a contract. And any contract is to be witnessed. Such as Naomi to Boaz in Ruth 4:9-12. A witness doesn't have to be as we know it signed by two or three witness'. But rather witnessed by any two or three people that know said couple. Yes we know that they are together.
Salvation is made very clear in scripture marriage, except that it's between a male and a female, is not. It is best to say, and safest to say, for both you your parnter and your children that one should rely on being legally married according to the law specific to your county, state, or country, unless it goes against the word of God. Certainly Christians will marry during the tribulation, when we may lose our rights as citizens, when a marriage wouldn't be considered legal, but what truly matters is that you are married in the eyes of God.
Categories: General thoughts
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